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Context is still King, I still mind what happens.
I am going to miss these figs, there were enough for the birds and me.
When I woke up this morning my ego had me firmly in its grip. I was thinking about our next move, where we go from here now our house is sold. Will we be able to find land that has such a beautiful orchard as we have now, will we be close to a river with a swimming hole ever again?
Obviously I was NOT excitedly enjoying the present moment, I was not fearlessly dreaming up a wonderful future, so I grabbed Eckhart Tolle’s ‘A New Earth’ to anchor myself back into the ‘now’.
The book opened on the page about Krishnamurti sharing his secret; “I do not mind what happens.”
The next thing I read was about a Zen Master who after having been falsely accused of having fathered a child responded with; “is that so.”
I could see the beauty of being able to not mind what is happening to me, of saying; “is that so” and just let life take me wherever.
I would no longer be a victim of circumstances, my ex and my daughters would no longer upset me with their weird and wonderful ways.
I could be carefree and feeling confident because I could handle life whatever happened next.
Cool, no more worries, life adventures here I come and no time wasted on gloomy thoughts in my warm bed.
To tell you the truth, I recently thought I was getting pretty close to being as smart as those enlightened people. Not getting upset, only having good thoughts about the future, just taking each moment as it comes, not worrying about retirement funds; that was me lately, pretty good don’t you think?
And on the surface it looked like I was close to enlightenment as I had little to get upset about. I have had a very good run this year so far.
John and I live in paradise since we moved from the city to a most beautiful place in nature.
We have lots of fresh veggies and the orchard just keeps on producing fruit. We just harvested the last of the figs, there was enough for the birds and us and now the oranges are coming on.
With John’s encouragement I quit my job some years ago. When we couldn’t sell our house, we were fortunate to rent it out to an awesome couple and then we found this place to live in in the interim.
We do not own a television; we do not read newspapers so I avoid being rattled by bad news stories.
Here I sit in this delightful home undisturbed, peacefully working on our business WomenLikeMe which is all about things close to my heart.
Not hard to be peaceful and to feel that I can handle life in this context of seclusion, nature and love.
My ‘is that so’ is most of the time pretty cool and being around cyberspace with such good company like yourselves adds to my feeling this blessed.
So, I can’t blame myself for thinking that I was soon to be photographed with a halo too.
But as I said, it is not to be, at least not yet.
As soon as the outside world intrudes, my bubble bursts and my ego comes up for air big time, happy to do battle.
The selling of the house for example has happened with very little upsets and worry but when I look back on that process, there were times when I did NOT react with; ‘is that so’. No brownie points for me when I freaked out when I got the phone call that the tenants were moving on. I fretted for at least two days about what next and how we could ever solve this problem.
I also noticed that when I go to town and leave my wonderful nature bubble, I pick up on people’s fear, bad news stories and their dysfunction straight away.
After I return home, I always have to work hard to get hold once more of my peacefulness, my faith that all is well and to know that I will not be homeless in my old age.
It shows to me that the context I am in is still very much King, I am still very vulnerable to my surroundings, I still can be persuaded by my context that what happens does matter. Busted!
So while most of the year my ego was friendly with the now as it got what it wanted, I got tricked into thinking that I was capable of being unaffected by what was happening and my peacefulness and happiness was my inner state. But as soon as things did not go my way and worrying thoughts about the future intruded, I was not skilled at all in ‘not minding what happens’.
However Eckhart Tolle says there is hope for me, I can learn as long as I am committed and willing to practice.
I say there is hope for me yet as well, as I do have a context that is on the same wavelength and encouraging me.
I am lucky there is John, WomenLikeMe and you and me in cyberspace.
So let’s go and in this supportive context let’s check where you are at with your ability to respond with; ‘Is that so’ and ‘I don’t mind what happens’ or if there is some work to be done.
- Is your relationship with money friendly or dysfunctional; do you feel ‘I have enough’ or do you detect worry? If you get confronted with unexpected bills do you respond with; ‘is that so’ or is your response a little different?
- How you think about money is often an indicator of how you think about the present moment. Is money your enemy, a driver to get you somewhere, or just energy that flows?
I have very seldom in my life experienced people who do NOT mind what happens. I have seen people who like me got fooled into thinking that they were advanced but in reality were not. It takes a lot of practice in a supportive context to notice your relationship with the present moment, to dissolve the power of your ego, to break the hold the external circumstances have on you. It takes a lot of practice to make you a strong joyful basecamp that can break free.
I am realizing that it is worth putting a lot of effort into the ability to go beyond the ego when the going gets tough.
I sincerely hope you will join me on WomenLikeMe, this is a way that you can make a difference, going beyond your ego regardless of the current often not so wonderful context you are in. It is only in the do-ing that things will change.
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39 Comments to “Context is still King, I still mind what happens.”
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Wilma: Great topic and insights. It is all about learning to manage through the highs and lows and whatever else may come your way. I really liked this post because it made me remember that challenges are going to come and as long as we can find a way to recenter and focus ourselves, we will be able to manage though all of them with grace and hopefully ease eventually. Even enlightened people have disturbances and there may be those times they even react to them, but the great thing about them that I have noticed is that they are able to instantly return to their center. Great post and insights.
Sibyl – alternaview´s last blog ..What You Must Do if You Want an Amazing Relationship
Hi Sibyl, it is indeed about managing life and not judging what comes at you and letting that throw you so much that it ruins your life. It is indeed all about bouncing back and getting on with living, it is about going forward with vigor regardless of what is happening. You are spot on, things always happen as we are not alone on this world, nobody can escape that yet at the moment. And until we all get our act together and do not throw curved balls, this is a very useful strategy for now, for enlightened people and us
. Love Wilma
Hi Wilma! I practice Zen. Key operative word here – practice. Every day. When I first arrived at the lake house, my contractor was not nearly as close to being done as I wanted. (He’s already 6 wks behind) so I had to immediately sit and breathe. Just that. Sit and breathe. If I didn’t do that, I’d have been a screaming lunatic and I can assure you I have been one! So yeah, it took me maybe a half hour of just sitting and breathing – and thining of only my breathing, not cursing the situation, or him, or the complicated chaotic mess the whole house is.
I dearly love Eckhart! Studying his book, taking the Oprah class on that book, and joining a book club that disected each chapter (we went thru the book TWICE in 9 months) it was all like cement for me. My practice is continual, daily, but it so works! Is that so? You betcha!
hugs
suZen
Hi SuZen.
OMG, THAT does require some breathing alright, 6 weeks behind. Oh my, the ego would have LOVED to do battle with that builder.
I do agree with this;
Going crazy and making the situation worse is so the ego’s automatic way but to do it differently oh yeah, that takes some doing.
Having seen the value of great useful explanations like Eckhart’s and then sticking to it, you have done a good job. I am so pleased you and I are on the same wavelength. I agree that you need to be committed. I love how you share the huge gain one gets from learning to do things differently rather than having the ego run away with your sanity and making the whole situation so much worse.
Oh my, you sure got your work cut out, but you came up trumps.
You sure are a strong basecamp, I knew you could do it, big huge hug, Wilma
Hi Wilma,
I am with you and SuZen in knowing that I can only try to be as, “is that so,” as the external environment will allow.
But your post has me thinking. Where I have been worried that my nonchalance on what is happening to us, with having to put the house on the market, was a sort of denial. Luckily I didn’t have the means to go to therapy and now look at that, you have led me away from that fear, making me realize that perhaps my inability to get scared over our circumstances might be a good thing. Thank you for that.
I loved receiving comments from you and SuZen congruently. You two keep me going you know!
Oh Jillian, it is one of the hardest things to do, to get this ego thing and be peaceful when things do NOT go to plan and then make everything we do wrong. We so have been trained to blame ourselves, to think we have done something wrong, that things are wrong etc etc.
We are so NOT wired to accept and feel not like a failure when we have to back track on our path. Oh Jillian, what IS important is how wonderfully you treat your beautiful sons. To notice your son’s looks and noticing that he notices you are not yourself, THAT is class. THAT is awesome. AND then taking him camping and reassuring him, THAT is love-in-action and the best thing you can do for your children, your husband and yourself right now. The rest is annoying but in the end doesn’t matter that much in the great scheme of things. The rest is all ego wreaking havoc and we all can do without that. You followed your heart, you did let joy return on that camping trip. Let the ego and its nasty Little Voice have their merry dance and then cast it aside and continue to see beyond that. Much love Wilma
I noticed that every time I reach my inner harmony – okay, life is finally good, everything is in its place, I am happy – then bang! something happens to throw me off my balance. It always serves as a reminder that life is not a destination, but a journey during which we get to learn a lot. And learning won’t be successful if a challenge is not thrown at us here and there. And we do grow by dealing with a sudden issue with wisdom and patience. And then we look back and think: maybe it wasn’t the most pleasant experience but it taught me something as well as helped me discover something new about myself.
With my emotional instability, I am heavily dependent on the context, so I try my best to alter the context to create the best possible conditions for a happy existence. Practicing this kind of escapism didn’t completely shell me from life and the context always finds a way to “get” me. But I remember to look at the bigger picture. I have everything to be a happy person even if I allow occasional moments of doubt and fear into my life.
Aysel´s last blog ..Coming Back from a Different World
Hi Aysel, oh is this not the case for everybody;
I think life can be great and stay peaceful but not right now and not before some things change drastically. I heard somebody once say that we actually live in such a mess, in such a sewerage. And if you live long enough in a smelly environment you don’t even notice anymore how messed up life is and how it throws dirt at us all the time. How can you stay clean in a stinky mess?
Throw in how we all have developed huge egos into that mix and you have a great recipe for disaster. I agree with you here totally;
Sure, how can you stay clean in the mud? But we keep trying because nobody ever tells us that we are living in a stinky mess.
For me is has been a process of waking up to the fact that we live in this huge mess AND that my ego plays into that. I am learning that beyond the ego we can rise above that, we can see the mess for what it is and start with the clean up without engaging in the drama of it all.
We have learned a lot of things that are keeping us in that mess, that are keeping us standing in the sewerage. Now is the time to learn how to clean it up and then we eventually will keep our equilibrium far more easily. In the meantime it is important to pay attention to the context as you do, pay attention to the conversations that are taking place and as best as we can choose the ones that suit us best.
I think you are spot on to notice all is not well, that you get thrown. What is missing for most of us at the moment is knowing what is happening and what alternatives there are. That is what I am offering at WomenLikeMe, an explanation and an alternative to deal with this confusion. Thank you so much Aysel for adding your experience to this dialog. We learn so much from sharing conversations like this, much love, Wilma
Hi Wilma .. I do mind what happens, but actually once I’d worked out that in fact it was going to happen and there was nothing I could do .. I had to adjust – & I did .. with plan a, b, c, d etc for all the possibilities .. and hope that things pan into place .. so far so good .. but some things still outstanding for an outcome .. we’ll see .. but all is not lost & that is the main thing.
I am not lost – is probably the important thing .. I am here, I am going forward, I will not be cowed and I will not accept negativity or the ills of the world .. we can hit the bottom, skate along for a while to adjust, and then we can rise as & how life takes us … in this first world, we should be ok – but our glass needs to be half full .. no point in moping, complaining, whingeing and not getting on with things – always keeping the options open .. and removing myself from any negative, or not letting it affect me – dealing with the issues straight away ..
Yes – I’m so grateful I’m with you, just sharing your enlightening posts towards understanding ourselves and our inward life .. I couldn’t have easily survived without the support I get here & elsewhere on the blogosphere .. it’s an amazing opportunity to see new ways and hear new ideas ..
& as you say it’s only in the doing .. that things will change – I’m looking forward to my change – that will plateau for a while, but that’s fine, I get time to regroup & then I’ll have had time for the sands to shift and see my way forward .. and with a clean slate and grateful heart I’ll be fine with the future .. lots of excitement – lots of newness .. I refuse to worry .. but I’m lucky and I count my blessings ..
You land will come about .. you’ll find a lovely place to be .. enjoy the search and the exploration .. hugs from up above, or down under! Hilary
Hilary´s last blog ..The Silent Pianist Speaks …
HI Hilary, I get that you observe how messy life is AND you are not wallowing in the drama of it all. You do what you can and truck on without letting the ego loose and throwing its tantrums;
THAT is indeed the way to deal with this mess at this moment of time, constantly cleaning it up, dealing with the upsets as best as we can, dealing with it rather than ignoring or fighting it AND being open to new points of view.
I am with you here too;
I am grateful for you too and everybody else here, we cannot do this alone, we need to validate what we see and we need to be shown how things can be done differently to get a different result. The status quo, the mess is powerful and hard to clean up.
Yes, we are the lucky ones to see another way out, I too am very grateful for that.
Hilary, you too thank you for joining this context and adding to these conversations, they are so important for change.
Big hug, Wilma
Oh my God…you are so funny and you don’t even have to try! I’ve been in that spot…thinking I’m enlightened … wanting my halo and then boom
I go play in someone else’s back yard because my life is going great;) LOL
Life is a process and some times we get it and some times we don’t. And that’s my “so” for the day.
So please pass my halo!
Tess The Bold Life´s last blog ..Rock Your Swagga
Oh Tess, your delightful honesty so supports me. To realize that we have taken on a colossal assignment is a consolation for the errant thoughts about enlightenment, don’t you think? I agree, it is a process; there is so much to learn and every situation is different and are still capable to topple me over. However as you keep saying, we are work in progress and at least I do feel we are making progress.
I definitely will pass your halo, anyone??? xox Wilma
Hi Wilma, oh how I’d love to say “Is that so” in the face of accusation, or confrontation or any kind of challenge or crisis. Sure, I have said this but only with matters unimportant and only with people I don’t have a deep relationship with. But when it comes to people I love the most, it seems I’m less adept at determining what is and isn’t important. Not only does everything seem important, instead of saying “Is that so”, I’m more apt to be in defensive mode and say a litany of what is so.
I have dreams of becoming enlightened; it sounds ideal and as an idealist, I get suckered by the notion. But I seriously doubt my capacity for enlightenment as long as I care. I think they are related. I care, therefore, I am attached, therefore, I am not enlightened. Or maybe, some things are easier to comprehend in print than in practice? Practice. That seems to be our collective downfall, doesn’t it?
And no, please keep looking for the rightful owner of the halo ’cause it ain’t me!
Thanks again for making me self-reflect on another important subject.
The photo is adorable! xo
Oh Belinda, it ain’t you either? Well, it seems we are in the right sisterhood then.
I do not think this is about caring. I do not think that that is what non-attachment and saying ‘I don’t mind what happens’ means.
Of course we care about our children, I do too and I care about John as well and a lot of other people. I had these issues too;
I too still want the best for my loved ones BUT I am becoming aware that I do not always have the innate knowledge WHAT is best for them. I would love them to be happy, to have loving partners, to have lots of money etc however I am actually doing them and myself a bigger favor by letting life unfold with warts and all for them, rather than having an opinion how it should be. It means when they have a set back, I am not immediately judging that as bad or judging it at all.
In those situation it is better to look at ‘what is so’, not have an opinion but look at how best I can assist them. Sometimes that means doing nothing and letting them find their own way out. THAT is what ‘I do not mind’ means, but it certainly will not mean not caring. But it means caring in a more appropriate trusting way and knowing we donot know it all.
Thanks for bringing this up though, there is still so much to figure out isn’t there?
Love Wilma
What I love about this blog (and I’m a first time commenting on your site) is that just when you think you have it all figured out, out comes a zinger. Not that I ever think I have it all figured out, but sometimes I think, “okay, I get that one now”…but soon after, there is another test, pushing me to the next level of growth on another matter. And I think, “c’mon, I just got the last lesson, gimme a break”. That’s what I love about you, you are on a quest for growth, and if you are on a quest for growth, there is always something to learn. I always love reading what you have learned!
Oh Lisa, high five to you for this;
As long as life is what it is, a jumbled chaotic experience, curved balls from the sideline will always have the chance to throw us off balance.
We need to be extremely well equipped to deal with what is happening around us. On top of that we have been trained to control every situation, to care what happens by insuring us to the nth degree and how on earth can we deal with those curved balls that despite our training in control do keep showing up? Is there something we weren’t told and taught?
I do agree that it can be disheartening sometimes to see how far off the game we still are, however it is also great to know that I am doing something that is getting results. My life is a whole lot more congruent and happier than when I was so ignorant about all this, ignorance certainly wans’t and isn’t bliss.
So what do you say, let’s keep going onwards and upwards and how you dealt with your boy’s ice-hockey weekend was awesome. Love Wilma
Hi Wilma,
It’s interesting, but sometimes I feel like I’m a little too “is that so.” And I’m really making that assessment based on comments that others have made to me about my detachment from whatever the “drama du jour” is. I think it makes them feel like I’m not invested or connected enough to them. But as much as I do enjoy intimacy, it seems that in some situations and with some people, the price for connecting is too heavy a burden. So I often adopt an “is that so” attitude because it just feels easier…but I have allowed myself to become cocky sometimes as well. Like you, I also gave up television about a year ago and in my feeling that it was such a huge step forward in my spiritual journey, I thought my immunity to the drama would be stronger; not so! Sure, my surroundings and circumstances have changed but the stuff is still there. So I’m still working on my reactions…it’s definitely a process. I have a book that I bought mostly because I love the title “After the Ecstasy, the Laundry” and lately it seems to keep coming up quite a bit in conversations I have…so maybe it’s high time I have a look beyond the cover!
Warms Hugs
Tisha´s last blog ..Mindfulness Mondays: Action is the Path to Attraction
Hi Tisha.
You make some wonderful observations here.
That means that the conversations you are having in that context don’t actually suit you and it is important to not let this context become King. In that case I go looking for a context that supports my point of view.
This is great as well;
Intimacy is NOT getting enrolled in other people’s stories and wallow with them in their dramas or complaints and then come away feeling depleted and upset yourself. Good on you for noticing that as well.
Ah yes Tisha, although we become more and more aware, the world around us is still in an awful mess and we will get muddy because of that. As long as we are conscious of that and as long as we have a sounding board in a context that support us, where we can check in with our thoughts, we have a chance to become the change we want to see. I personally am so committed to that change, but I am also aware it is a big task. Therefore high five to you too and although we do not feel we are halo material yet, I think we are doing a good job. Hugs Wilma
I am a work in progress!
Dear Wilma,
I’m back from vacation and feeling all sorts of well rested! You asked some very specific questions about money – a tool I’m mostly comfortable with but sometimes the ego trips me up (no halo for me!) Like your post about water and how you cut back and started thinking scarcity thoughts, I sometimes get that way about money and I have to remind myself, that yes, there is enough. Is there Suze Orman enough? No…but there is enough.
My scarcity thinking is like a hose that’s been kinked up. Once I let go of it, the kink disappears and the water flows freely. And so does the money.
Love,
Peggy
Peggy´s last blog ..Go Help Someone
Okay Peggy, no halo for you either, however you are at least the queen of self-care.
Yes, our thinking can be like this;
I do notice though that the context I am in can influence if the kink stays there or disappears. I will not talk to certain people about money as they will and cannot think other than scarcity and I will come away from them feeling less prosperous.
I much rather talk to you, xox Wilma
Wilma –
This was a great read. Is it possible that there is a part of me that does respond with “is that so” and another part that goes through the insecurities and the fear and yet there is always that part underneath it all that knows it is all going to work? I have had these conversations with myself on and off throughout my life – I was laid off and afraid that I would not be able to support my then infant daughter and that it was very personal (the lay off) and that I would not find a job… and yet, deep inside I knew it would all be fine. I am working to become more “is that so” on all levels so that the knowledge I feel within is something I experience on the surface as well. The worry and emotional conversations I have with myself are exhausting at times.
Thanks for this post -
The Exception´s last blog ..There is so much more…
HI TE, I do think we oscillate between listening to our inner knowing and responding to our fearful context. The more we work on and be in the context of trusting all is well, the more we eventually can withstand the context that tells us otherwise.
It is like learning a new language in the context where everybody else still speaks the old and that is not a mean feat.
Oh I can understand that ‘is that so’ is hard when you have a little one to bring up and no support to speak off, however I take my hat off to you for this;
And this is what makes life such a wasteland if we let this happen too often;
But that is how most people go through life, worrying and losing all these precious moments they could have been creatively doing something with life.
I love how you are progressing, xox Wilma
Hi Wilma
Very dear story to my heart. I LOVE that story in “A New Earth” – to have that kind of reaction to all , yes, may we all aspire to that.
You know some people will argue that that just can’t be healthy, we are emotional creatures, they will loudly exclaim, we need to show our feelings and reactions…. but I don’t buy it. Because I know how it feels to live it, and feel it and it just feels to right within me to not react.
And here is where I agree with you even more, the context indeed is our biggest as I will call it “test” – how are we progressing? evolving? changing? growing?
In the end Wilma, do not beat yourself up one bit… I have found that every time I reached a certain point of comfort and confidence, there was a situation or person who would come around and present me with an opportunity to live out my truth as I think I have it. And I was grateful for every one, for they kept raising me to a higher version of myself, and still do. What I think is that it is a beautiful ongoing process, that only slows the more we learn to one day melt into a state of complete inner peace.
P.S. gosh the orchard and all the natural life you describe sounds so much like where our life is now headed as you also mentioned to me before. I know and I trust that you will end up in a new amazing place, that is just right for your new version of you, and one which will lead you to your new high
Evita –
I had to respond to this as I find the same… just when I think I am “there” someone or something happens that leaves me asking… Where am I now? Whatever it is pushes me to a new place and more strength and spirit.
It is that same idea, perhaps, that when a “source” of discord leaves our lives or we move from that discord… the challenges return as we can’t run or escape from the lessons. The lessons are ours to learn and aren’t dependent upon a single situation or source of discord.
Loved you comment and Thank you Wilma for the support!
The Exception´s last blog ..There is so much more…
Hi TE,
As I said to Evita, thank you for chiming in, these dialogs are so important to clarify and validate things for us all.
To respond to this; just when I think I am “there” someone or something happens that leaves me asking… Where am I now? Whatever it is pushes me to a new place and more strength and spirit.
I am getting to see that the world around us, the context we live in, the conversations around us are still very much of the old, unfriendly ego ilk. Most people are self absorbed, hardly paying attention to their heart, totally buying into fear, money and their own whatisinitforme and pulling people who are going for change back into line. So yes, our new way of being is continually challenged and the more we are aware of that, the more we can brace ourselves. I also am firmly believing that we cannot do it alone, at least there is no way I can. I thrive on this support, on validation that how I desire to live is NOT crazy and impossible. I also thrive on consistent reminders of the explanations of this new way because there are not many role models around who live this way and I am just a newby who can easily get confused with all this opposition around me.
You can see why I think this support we give each other is so important and why I am so hoping people will commit to keep going with this, preferably by joining me on WomenLikeMe where we are working on the so necessary steadfastness and validation.
Therefore TE, thank you again for taking this serious and paying attention, much love Wilma
Dear Evita, I do agree that there is still a lot of misunderstanding about the new way of approaching life, which is understandable. The ego in particular will not go under without a fight and most people honestly believe that the drama and all the pain is a great way to feel alive. Unless you have committed yourself to try another way, you have indeed no idea that all that drama is counterproductive and does NOT make you feel alive, it just makes me feel disturbed and fearful and self absorbed.
For me I wish everybody would try this other approach so they too get to experience the difference.
Thank you for your concern Evita but I no longer am beating myself up but I do pay attention to where I am at with all this. To become too complacent too soon is not useful. As you say;
The world around us is so far off the game, that the context we live in will consistently and relentlessly pull us back and we just need to be aware of that. I do agree, we need to become strong and only experience will allow us to strengthen our ‘Is that so’ muscles.
And with each opportunity we will clean up more and more of our environment, of our context. Because I do believe that we contribute hugely with our efforts to not be enrolled in the drama around us. We indeed need to rise above it and see it for what it is as you did with your post about the earthquake. And that is not being callous.
But because we are learning I do feel it is important to keep paying attention to where we are at and to validate each other who are practicing another way because it is so easy to topple with these opposite forces around us.
Therefore I love TE chiming in as we are in this together. xox Wilma
Wilma,
I learn so much from how you react. Sometimes I think I couldn’t possible measure up to the calm presence you induce into your life. Then I read this and think- oh yeah – that is SO me. So it is so.
My ego flys off the handle, my heart keeps me grounded. I continually remind myself no matter what happens, it will be a mega blessing in my life.
I have nothing to fear and only acceptance and love to bring it forth with.
Still, those battle moments are so hard.
Life continues to flow smoothly, freely and with a journey ahead.
Hugs and love Wilma,
XoXo
Angelia Sims´s last blog ..Yo, Where my apps at?
Oh Dear Angelia, you are doing marvelous. Life is coming at us left, right and center and how can we always stay balanced. But as long as we can find our hearts all is well and you sure can. If you can share your beloved Iphone with those girls of yours, you are on the way to sainthood:)
But seriously, it is a matter of paying attention and having the commitment to practice that what you like to learn. That is all we can ever do and I am a few years ahead of you, so there is some advantage in age (ahum).
Much love to you, you are a champ, xox Wilma
Wilma,
As I read this – I’m reminded of just yesterday. Our car was in the shop for some work being done on it. And – not surprisingly, the cost was definitely more than we had anticipated. There was this initial factor of “how much??”. That quickly, though, turned to seeing the good in this moment. There is so much to celebrate – we’ve had this car for nine years. The car runs great…and now, even better. The experience at this shop is top notch (every time). I feel safe driving my car. As I let all these thoughts become part of me – money did NOT have to be the ruling factor. In the past, I have done exactly the opposite. Today, there is a peace in all of this. That’s not to say that I still don’t sometimes act in ways that are opposite of what I’m saying here. I do. It is, though, that these are become less and less.
We have this moment. Now. What the next hour, the next day, the next year brings – to some degree…unknown. So, worrying about that today doesn’t serve us. That’s what I draw from this – and it’s so good for me to continually reinforce this message. Worry doesn’t serve. Today, to the best of my ability, I choose to be in the moment…
Lance´s last blog ..Life, Reflection, and Cancer
Hi Lance, oh yes what a wealth lies in seeing the ‘is that so?’ like this;
This whole thought process can only lead to feeling prosperous and safe and peaceful and indeed in the end has nothing to do with money at all.
Oh, when you see it written down like this, it is a no-brainer really to go this way. Thoughts can make or break our lives and oh, how come it is still such an effort. It still beats me, however I am just so immensely grateful that there is a different way of doing and thinking that I now can practice. Lance this was a cracker of an example of turning things around in a way everybody benefits, you valued your mechanic, your car and your own peace of mind and what an example are you for your children.
Much love, Wilma
Hi Wilma — thanks for this — I can definitely relate. Whenever I find myself clinging to the role of “spiritual person” or “healer,” something will always happen in the world to show me that it only creates suffering to get attached to that (or any other) identity.
Hahaha you too, every time when I was focused on my ego when I started to present a workshop, I lost the plot. I tripped over my bag, dropped all the folders or spilled my coffee. Never ever did I succeed in presenting a sophisticated ‘ego-me’. However when I was focused on who was in front of me, wanting to make a real human contribution those things never happened and when they did they did not rattle me.
But we are aware and thus high five to us for our progress, xox Wilma
Wilma,
Blessings upon you. J
I love your honesty about how that wily ego grabs hold of us and convinces us that something is just not quite right. I also love the idea of “Just this” as you know from my current blog post. Like you, I am constantly being invited deeper into what is right here, right now, in front of me. And to trust that that is just fine. I don’t need to CHANGE it or even REACT to it. But I can choose how to RESPOND it. I bet that your next place is going to offer even more than this one does. The Universe has a funny way of granting that wish…especially when we let go.
Dear Jan, yes your last post was very timely with ‘just this’ and I loved how your post gave me yet another way to access this trust, this knowing all is well beyond the ego’s interference and judgment. There is such a power, such a respect for who we are behind our ability to choose, I am getting more and more that we need to respect and honor our origin and I love how you and your writing contribute to my understanding.
I smile when reading your words, yes, it is quite a great way to be, letting it unfold and expecting the best with desire but no attachment. Blessings to you too, love Wilma
Wilma,
Wow…is this a good post for me to read. I’ve done something similar to you. I’ve isolated myself to some degree from everyday worries. While I own a TV, I don’t watch news programs and I no longer read the newspaper. I try to focus on good things in my life and be more gentle with how I approach life.
Like you, however, my gentleness and calmness totally disappears and the weather turns rough when something rocks my boat…like a bill I didn’t expect, a worry about something I can’t control, fretting about the health of my dog, etc.
On the other hand, I am better at calming myself when these things happen and I think that counts for something. I am slowly teaching myself to learn how to let things go. It’s a beginning:~)
Sara´s last blog ..Where You Ought to Be
Sara, at least we are not deluding ourselves, at least we are catching the ‘lipstick on our teeth’ when we participate in dialogs like these. We hear, we observe ourselves and bingo we can catch our doing and correct.
Well, that sure is better than what we did before, ignorantly following our ego when dealing with upsets and wondering all the time about ‘why us?’.
I love being able to go to peaceful more and more and it is not at all boring isn’t it?
Much love from one beginner to another, xox Wilma, let’s race each other for that halo shall we?
Hey there Wilma!
I have missed your writing since I have been away from my blogs the past couple weeks. What a great post this is! I can relate SO well! After reading “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, I was completely changed. I was so much more aware of my mind and really felt like I was living consciously.
Fast forward a few months later and that clarity starts to slowly get foggy. I read the book now and again to remind myself of the power of now and that living in it is really the only way. Eckhart Tolle’s teachings have really changed my life, that is for sure. But I also have so much more to learn and so much more to grow. Ithink I’m okay with that though. I figure striving for self improvement has to mean something and I must admit I am much happier for it. You will be too once you become even more “This is So” about the present. Being observant of this cycle will allow you to grow even more!
Anyway, I have written a book! I hope your new transition is going well
Kristie
Hey Kristie, great to hear you are becoming aware of the ego. That is such a good move.
Self improvement is ongoing and I do agree, be okay with that as I think it is the most important thing you can do for yourself. Unless you are well resourced to make the most of life, you are at the mercy of your ego and everything else and look where that got the world.
Thank goodness there is such good material that has become available because we are obviously ready for it. I do hope one day you will join WomenLikeMe as I am sure you will lap it up and will gain so much. Until then I am thrilled you love the books that come your way and you are showing up here. And of course nature is the best companion to keep, you will have a life that rock if you carry on like this
Much love, Wilma
Why thank you Wilma
I surely hope I have a great life full of adventure and learning!
I hope to one day be able to join WomenLikeMe as well. It sounds like such a great program and once I get out of debt and in control of my finances I will be able to splurge on myself with programs like these. I find what you write to be very inspiring with the effect of raising my awareness and conscious which is always a good thing.
I am so very greatly for the books that are being published to educate myself and others on how things should be as they clearly have not been heading in the right direction. We shall see what happens! I think great things will be in store though, especially with the blogging world
Take care,
Kristie