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Will the real me please stand up!
But it is a different ball game now I have to describe myself meaningful outside this prescribed and known context of a resume.
On my own volition I have ventured into this new context, this great unknown cyber space, and now I feel lost without the rules that have guided me for so long.
It is just me and my own creativity AND . . . ahum freedom.
Freedom to declare who I am.
Doing it in any way I like . . . AND I feel the pressure of; “What do I say that does do me justice, is authentic and is how I desire to be seen?”
If I am honest, I think this freedom to declare ‘who I am’ is actually freaking me out.
But thank goodness, while freaking out I remembered this quote from Marianne Williams that really touched me when I first read it;
She says;
“We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
We are all meant to shine as children do. We are born to manifest the glory of God that is within us.”
Hmm, although her quote touched me, when I ask myself; “Am I brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous, do I shine brightly?” . . . I don’t go; “Thanks Marianne, you hit the nail on the head, I’ve got my answer”, no I freak out even more.
So I am stuck and I am annoyed; how come I have so much trouble declaring who I am and doing it knowingly, confidently and positively?
Has nobody ever told me who I am?
I don’t think that is it.
The real issue is actually quite the opposite.
Too much information has been coming at me about me.
So much, from so many quarters, and so contradictory, that I got lost in it all.
From a young age it starts with personal information; how I should and shouldn’t be.
In one context I am wrong for being outspoken and then in the next context I am supposed to be self expressed.
At home I am told I am brilliant and then at school I get told who do I think I am?
During my study I am encouraged to be daring and make mistakes and at work I get into trouble for being so daring.
Then I haven’t even mentioned all the societal stuff that gets thrown in.
Gheeez . . . that is enough contradiction to do anybody’s head in; how on earth can I make sense of it all?
How am I supposed to be in tune with who I am, when all that I experienced in life has been push me, pull me with who I am.
So where do I go from here?
Well, I can see that a wise thing to do is to accept that I will never be able to stop what is coming at me.
There is no way the world will stop bombarding me with information about how I am and how I am not.
What I can do about it though, is being more discerning about what I am taking on and NOT accept everything that is being said about me.
I can start behaving as if I have a choice and stop being at the mercy of others.
So I will.
I will observe and use how I feel about what I hear as my guidelines.
If the information that is coming at me about me, feels good, I take it on.
If the information makes me feel uncomfortable, fearful, angry or distressed, I simply refuse to take it on.
Let’s try this.
Who am I?
I am a child of God, shining brightly, being brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous.
How does that make me feel?
Wonderful!
Now I can use this as a base. With this in mind I can now boldly declare who I am.
AND . . .
NO, *Little Voice*, you saying that this is ridiculous, that I am NOT talented doesn’t make me feel good, so thanks for sharing and now buzz off.
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6 Comments to “Will the real me please stand up!”
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Hey Wilma,
I like what you said here…”NOT accept everything that is being said about me.”
As you know, I have had many experiences over the last couple of weeks in regards to my resume too. One thing I noticed was that the more people I was interviewed by, the more opinions I received in regards to who I “should” be in front of a prospective employer. They were vastly different though. Some amusing, some I took on board.
I reflected upon all this afterwards and realized that if I did not have somewhere firm to stand in myself about knowing who I am then I will only get confused and frustrated as I search for everyone else’s approval.
A good place to stand sometimes is to know that you Wilma are truly blessed with your insights and understandings about yourself. You already have powerful life distinctions to prevent you getting trapped forever in yourself. You know things that most of the population don’t know and instead they mend by fixing and surviving. (Victim behaviour, “that is the truth and that is just the way I am.” ) And life rolls on. We have all been there though. This has helped me during interviews with very difficult people that (after a bit of reminding from you and John) I chose NO PLAY! So who are you then Wilma?
To remember that you know what others don’t know that they don’t know can allow to see the significance others put on their lives. The corporate status for instance, the letters in front of their names, the systematic placement of people on the above floor creates significance and power. The seriousness, the arrogance, the ambition to succeed, move on up, climb the ladder. The irony is that the hierarchy has told them who they are meant to be…………and they took the bait. You are free Wilma because you have the ability to look at the hook and see the enticing danger for what it is and to swim away. A smart fish you are. So who are you then Wilma?
Of course there is a fine line with all of this. We can easily get drawn into the “us and them” mentality. We are better etc etc. Stay away from the trap. Those who don’t know what they don’t know have never been offered the chance to choose. They may become as great as you when they are ultimately shown “the matrix” so to speak. Or they can decline the offer once shown. Who knows. Ask yourself, what would Buddha do? Laughing in all his roundness seems the only thing he would do. Laugh about the whole situation that we are all puppets on a stage. You however are the puppet learning to walk without strings. Therefore you are not a puppet. Who are you then? Declare it and own it Wilma.
I AM a person who sees the world differently and I AM comfortable with it and I AM a person who trusts in life. Do I get scared saying this sometimes? Hell yes. I wasn’t taught to see the world differently, or to be comfortable, or to trust.
For centuries people have pondered “who am I?”. They walked around in circles with it for years waiting for an external sign of their divine objectives. God has only ever said, choose! And that is all we have ever done.
Wow Blair, thanks for this amazing comment.
I will never forget that I too was once like this;
“Those who don’t know what they don’t know don’t have a chance to choose” . The knowing that there is lots I don’t know keeps me humble and keeps me questioning and keeps me careful what I take on too.
Thanks for encouraging me to declare and own who I am.
We are in this together, Blair.
Fantastic Wilma, you have to get to know yourself to truly know someone else.
However I have to disagree about this comment: If the information that is coming at me about me, feels good, I take it on. If the information makes me feel uncomfortable, fearful, angry or distressed, I simply refuse to take it on.
In my experience that’s just shutting yourself down to new information. Certainly you have to ask the question “Is this information valid, does this person know what they are talking about?” Often of course they don’t – and you can just ignore it.
BUT if you don’t take the opportunity to listen to something you don’t like, you will miss on the possibility of learning something new. Something you didn’t know you didn’t know.
Keep learning, keep growing, you are shining bright! Love the way your site is changing and you with it. Aroha,
Andrew.
@ Andrew, Before we can have any hope of knowing if new information is valid, it is perhaps useful to listen to what is being said.
I always enjoy what you have to say, keep up the good work. Do you have a webcam?
Wow re : “Those who don’t know what they don’t know don’t have a chance to choose”. that is just universal.